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it was everything

 
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lins002
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MessagePosté le: Mer 20 Jan - 07:26 (2010)    Sujet du message: it was everything Répondre en citant

In the doorway of my home, I looked closely at the face of my 23-year-old son, Daniel, his backpack by his side. We were saying good-bye. In a few hours he would be flying to France. He would be staying there for at least a year to learn another language and experience life in a different country.

It was a transitional time in Daniel‘s life, a passage, a step from college into the adult world. I wanted to leave him some words that would have some meaning, some significance beyond the moment.

But nothing came from my lips. No sound broke the stillness of my beachside home. Outside, I could hear the shrill cries of sea gulls as they circled the ever changing surf on Long Island. Inside, I stood frozen and quiet, looking into the searching eyes of my son.
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What made it more difficult was that I knew this was not the first time I had let such a moment pass. When Daniel was five, I took him to the school-bus stop on his first day of kindergarten. I felt the tension in his hand holding mine as the bus turned the corner. I saw colour flush his cheeks as the bus pulled up. He looked at me-as he did now.

What is it going to be like, Dad? Can I do it? Will I be okay? And then he walked up the steps of the bus and disappeared inside. And the bus drove away. And I had said nothing.

A decade or so later, a similar scene played itself out. With his mother, I drove him to William and Mary College in Virginia. His first night, he went out with his new schoolmates, and when he met us the next morning, he was sick. He was coming down with mononucleosis, but we could not know that then. We thought he had a hangover.

In his room, Dan lay stretched out on his bed as I started to leave for the trip home. I tried to think of something to say to give him courage and confidence as he started this new phase of life.

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Again, words failed me. I mumbled something like, "Hope you feel better Dan."
Now, as I stood before him, I thought of those lost opportunities. How many times have we all let such moments pass? A boy graduates from school, a daughter gets married. We go through the motions of the ceremony, but we don‘t seek out our children and find a quiet moment to tell them what they have meant to us. Or what they might expect to face in the years ahead.

How fast the years had passed. Daniel was born in New Orleans, LA., in 1962, slow to walk and talk, and small of stature. He was the tiniest in his class, but he developed a warm, outgoing nature and was popular with his peers. He was coordinated and 6)agile, and he became adept in sports.

Baseball gave him his earliest challenge. He was an outstanding pitcher in Little League, and eventually, as a senior in high school, made the varsity, winning half the team‘s games with a record of five wins and two losses. At graduation, the coach named Daniel the team‘s most valuable player.
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His finest hour, though, came at a school science fair. He entered an exhibit showing how the circulatory system works. It was primitive and crude, especially compared to the fancy, computerized, blinking-light models entered by other students. My wife, Sara, felt embarrassed for him.

It turned out that the other kids had not done their own work-their parents had made their exhibits. As the judges went on their rounds, they found that these other kids couldn‘t answer their questions. Daniel answered every one. When the judges awarded the Albert Einstein Plaque for the best exhibit, they gave it to him.
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By the time Daniel left for college he stood six feet tall and weighed 170 pounds. He was muscular and in superb condition, but he never pitched another inning, having given up baseball for English literature. I was sorry that he would not develop his athletic talent, but proud that he had made such a mature decision.

One day I told Daniel that the great failing in my life had been that I didn‘t take a year or two off to travel when I finished college. This is the best way, to my way of thinking, to broaden oneself and develop a larger perspective on life. Once I had married and begun working, I found that the dream of living in another culture had vanished.

Daniel thought about this. His friends said that he would be insane to put his career on hold. But he decided it wasn‘t so crazy. After graduation, he worked as a waiter at college, a bike messenger and a house painter. With the money he earned, he had enough to go to Paris.

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The night before he was to leave, I tossed in bed. I was trying to figure out something to say. Nothing came to mind. Maybe, I thought, it wasn‘t necessary to say anything.

What does it matter in the course of a life-time if a father never tells a son what he really thinks of him? But as I stood before Daniel, I knew that it does matter. My father and I loved each other. Yet, I always regretted never hearing him put his feelings into words and never having the memory of that moment. Now, I could feel my palms sweat and my throat tighten. Why is it so hard to tell a son something from the heart? My mouth turned dry, and I knew I would be able to get out only a few words clearly.

“Daniel," I said, "if I could have picked, I would have picked you."

That‘s all I could say. I wasn‘t sure he understood what I meant. Then he came toward me and threw his arms around me. For a moment, the world and all its people vanished, and there was just Daniel and me in our home by the sea.
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He was saying something, but my eyes misted over, and I couldn‘t understand what he was saying. All I was aware of was the stubble on his chin as his face pressed against mine. And then, the moment ended. I went to work, and Daniel left a few hours later with his girlfriend.

That was seven weeks ago, and I think about him when I walk along the beach on weekends. Thousands of miles away, somewhere out past the ocean waves breaking on the deserted shore, he might be scurrying across Boulevard Saint Germain, strolling through a musty hallway of the Louvre, bending an elbow in a Left Bank café.

What I had said to Daniel was clumsy and trite. It was nothing. And yet, it was everything.


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MessagePosté le: Mer 20 Jan - 07:26 (2010)    Sujet du message: Publicité

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ailj168
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MessagePosté le: Sam 10 Juil - 06:17 (2010)    Sujet du message: it was everything Répondre en citant

I get a lot of questions from people who read my articles or visit my site asking me if I can give them some specific steps to follow to get started making changes in their lives.
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Unfortunately, archlord money I don’t really have a step-by-step program for self improvement, so as much as I’d love to help, I can’t really tell them much other than to just get started.

But I’m also happy to give that very simple piece of advice, because getting started is the hardest part of… well, anything. And it’s the most intimidating. There’s a fear of the unknown that likes to creep its way in and it often leads to another overwhelming fear: failure.

And that will often stop us right in our tracks. I’ve seen it absolutely paralyze some people.
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And that’dog clothes s a shame because it’s really a pretty irrational fear, if you think about it. Failure should actually be something we embrace, because failure, believe it or not, is the best teacher.

Think about it. When have you learned and progressed the most during your life? I’m going to go right ahead and guess that it was after making a mistake and realizing that that was the wrong way to do it.
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If you’re like most people, maple story mesos then that’s how it’s done. And then if you’re smart about it, then you’ve taken what you’ve learned and made the necessary course corrections, and continued on, never to make that same mistake again. Congratulations.

I really only view failure as failure if someone insists on doing things the wrong way over and over again without really caring or paying much attention to what’s going on. But most people don’t do that.

Most people learn from their mistakes. So you might as well go ahead and make them. But that means getting over your fears and finally getting started.
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All you really need is a little bit of confidence. flyff penya But true confidence doesn’t just come out of nowhere for no reason. Confidence comes with experience. Most people build their confidence by achieving small gains along the way. Once they see that they can do it, then they become confident enough to move onto the next step in their development. Then they complete that one, build a little more confidence, and start working towards the next step. And so on.

I like to call it the upward spiral.
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Stop and think about the things you’ve already done, last chaos gold like learning to ride a bicycle, or drive a car, or any job you’ve ever had. At first, you didn’t know how to do them, and you were probably pretty nervous, but little by little, you got it, and eventually it became almost second nature – almost like you could do it in your sleep – and any nerves you may have had about it disappeared.

So if you really want to get things done, and really change your life for the better, then at some point you’re going to have to risk falling off your bicycle, so to speak.

To add a little color, I’ve included this quote from Teddy Roosevelt: “Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure… than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.”
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Well said, Mr. President. cheap wow gold Here’s another example: When I first started learning kung fu way back when, I was extremely nervous. My only goal that first day was to not fall on my face and make a fool of myself. Luckily, I didn’t, and I survived, and I kept going to class. The more I went, the more comfortable I got with it. And eventually I came to realize that it was silly of me to have been so concerned. Of course, it certainly helped that it was a good environment to learn in.

You see, success is not an all or nothing proposition. Your only choices are not to be a colossal failure or a colossal success. It doesn’t work that way.

OK, I’m repeating myself here, but real success is made up of smaller successes and achievements that build confidence and slowly get rid of that fear of the unknown. Which kind of means that you need to let yourself ride the wave, rather than looking only at the end goal. You’re never done growing, so you might as well let yourself enjoy the journey, rather than looking at everything as a fight for you to win or lose.

Have you ever heard the expression, “Slow and steady wins the race”? Well, when it comes to personal growth, it’s absolutely true.

What Are You So Afraid Of?


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simluo
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MessagePosté le: Dim 26 Sep - 04:17 (2010)    Sujet du message: it was everything Répondre en citant

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xnzqiao
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MessagePosté le: Lun 13 Déc - 10:33 (2010)    Sujet du message: it was everything Répondre en citant

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MessagePosté le: Mer 22 Déc - 10:19 (2010)    Sujet du message: it was everything Répondre en citant

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MessagePosté le: Mar 15 Fév - 07:23 (2011)    Sujet du message: it was everything Répondre en citant

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MessagePosté le: Jeu 14 Avr - 08:05 (2011)    Sujet du message: it was everything Répondre en citant

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